We are all moved back into our apartment after houseitting for our friends this month. There is something so comforting about just being home. No more two story, 5-bedroom house with little Libby to care for. We got all our things put where they belong and dusted and cleared a few cob webs. In my cleaning I began to realized that when we compare ourselves to others it might seem like we don’t have it all, but I was very humbled last night having my eyes opened to see just how much God has given to us.

God gives of His goodness so abundantly and freely. I don’t always live in this fresh perspective of not taking things for granted and thankful for my blessings, but it isn’t because I don’t have what I need, I have so much more. I remember a college professor of mine used to say that Satan really works to get us to deny four key truths of God: His Word, His plan, His authority and His goodness. This is right where we doubt isn’t it?

Sometimes we exalt ourselves to a position that says, “I’m in charge,” and we proceed in a vain attempt to orchestrate our own life and events. This is our pride. Seeing God’s authority depends on our humility. I have been learning alot about humility this week and how little I actually posess of it. I am finding that humility is closely linked to obedience. This relates to authority in that if I am puffed up with pride, I am calling the shots in my life, obeying my own desires and lusts that drive me and am choosing to ignore God’s authority. When I am humble I will be submissive to God’s will and God’s commands, and in doing so recognizing who He is, Lord over all. I was very inspired to read a post by a fellow blogger yesterday as she wrote about humility, “Humbling myself before God means that I will simply obey. I won’t look for spiritual “loopholes” to get out of doing what He wants. I won’t continue to wonder what His will for me is when it’s perfectly clear what it is.”

The days of guests on Spring Break, late night card games and playing with Libby are coming to an end along with the month of March. I love having guests visiting and housesitting for our friends and I like how at the end of all that there is something renewing about going back to our own home and it just being the two of us again. This week we will be moving back to our apartment and taking up our happy life there of more regular habits, longer nights sleep and this joy of renewal.

This morning I was reading Psalm 63, perhaps my favorite Psalm. And I am touched and challenged by the poetic phrases of praise and the depth of the writer’s commitment and longing:

“O God, You are my God; Early I will seek You;
My soul thirst for You; My flesh longs for You.
In a dry and thirsty land where there is no water.
So I have looked for You in the sanctuary,
To see Your power and Your glory.

Because Your lovingkindness is better than life,
My lips shall praise You.
Thus I will bless You while I live;
I will lift up my hands in Your name.
My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness,
And my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips.

When I remember You on my bed,
I meditate on You in the night watches.
Because You have been my help;
Therefore in the shadow of Your wings I will rejoice.
My soul follows close behind You;
Your right hand upholds me.”

Psalm 63:1-9

This Psalm speaks depths to the joy of fellowship with God. There is such belonging and dedication in his words. He speaks of seeking, thirsting, longing and looking for the Lord, to see Him and know His power and glory. He speaks of praise, blessing and satisfaction as what constitutes his life and what he will continue to do. The line that really sings of the writer’s surrender and dedication to the Lord is verse 3, “Your lovingkindness is better than life.” Wow. So often the Christian life is what people do, not life itself. I find my heart much more aligned with the Psalmist in this verse than the casual Sunday morning, Wednesday night routines of American Christianity today. God is life. God is better than life. The world has such a crooked view of life. We deny food and water to people who can’t care for themselves, abortion is accepted and the common message of society is to simply find your purpose. The Psalmist’s statement is quite contrary. He sees his life not as what he can do , but as what God has done and continues to do for him and in him. He doesn’t speak as one questioning God or wondering why he can’t get what he wants in life. He speaks as one who is surrendered, not divided, but wholeheartedly devoted to Him as his help, which he follows and rejoices in. He knows that it is in God’s hands where all of time and life exist. It is He who gives and takes away. He sees life in the shadow of God’s wings, satisfied and holding fast to Him. He views his purpose as following close behind the Lord, longing to see His glory.

Sometimes I fall in the trap of myself. I step out from under God’s wings and I look at Him through my desires the circumstances and the twisted world in which we live. And I begin to ask myself, what is God doing for me? Why isn’t He answering my prayers or bringing justice to pass? I am looking at Him through the lens of the world, circumstances and my own unchecked desires. Instead I should be looking at the world, my circumstances and have my desires checked through the lens of His Word and lovingkindness. Sometimes I look at life and I see lots of ways that it could be better. But other times, like today, I am looking to the Lord and seeing that He is better because He is life.

“O Father I can’t do without,
Your love that’s better than all of life to me,
For without You,
I’m nothing.”

Housesitting for our friends has sure has come in handy this month with Bobby’s family, Brad and my sister all up to visit. We are even expecting more guests this weekend, so it seems as though we are running some sort of hotel or bed and breakfast place. Monica arrived the other day and we are having a fabulous visit. She does homework all day while I’m at the office and at lunch and in the evenings we spend time together. Last night we met our older sister Alicia at the mall. Monica was there to get her haircut and I came along to pick up a frother so that we could have Tea-Chinos.

Last night Monica and I worked on a puzzle over cups of tea and I realize how good it is to have a sister-friend. We have many relatives, but very few are true friends. I find it to be very unique relationship. Normally you meet a friend. But a sister has been there all along, you’ve known each other since before you can even remember. Usually you are telling a friend stories and memories from your past, but with a sister, she was there when those things happened. It can be a solid relationship of deep understanding and closeness. This is not to say that all sister relationships will be friendships. Sometimes two sisters simply never grow close, or have very differing interests. If a friendship like this with a sister(or brother) can stand the tests of time and change…this is something to be treasured.

I find that many people do not have a good grasp on what a godly and productive friendship is. It might be related to how they view Jesus’ thoughts on friendhips. I usually feel uncomfortable with refering to Jesus as our “friend.” But today I read a John 15:14-15 and it shed a different light on this concept.

“Jesus said, ‘You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, becasue a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I have learned from my Father I have made known to you’.”

I like how Jesus spells out so clearly the definition of friend. I have found that people are usually so caught up in the selfish demands of human friendship that the relationships seems pointless and unproductive. In many human friendships it is, “You are my friends if you…” and then a long list something like this follows: pursue me, show up at all my parties and special life events, give me gifts, stand by me no matter what, affirm my decisions good and bad, make me feel good about myself, and maybe even don’t challenge me. Jesus doesn’t have this friendship to-do list, He defines “friend” as obedience. Now clearly this definition does not run in our horizontal relationships by us saying to one another, “Obey me.” But as we are called to be like Christ, our friendships must be about doing what He commands, not what we or our personality prefers. Sometimes this means I must gently exhort a friend, endure patiently with a friend’s faults, challenge my friend spiritually. I can’t be gossiping or being angry with a friend, and I shouldn’t just condone all they do, but pointing them to the holy standard of Christ.

I think we sometimes take friendships very lightly. We merely exist with people rather than really knowing them or actively seeking to build them up in the Lord and walk along side them, growing together. Sometimes we just spend time with people simply because that is always what has been done. My heart has changed from settling for this sort of counterfeit friendship and I am being renewed to see the full and purposed relationships that honor the Lord…ones that are all wrapped up in and focused on Him.

“If we walk in the light as God is in the light,
we will have fellowship with one another.”
(1 John 1:7)

The last few days we have had the pleasure of the company of our good friend, Bradford Smith. We’re having a great time with him visiting and it is so convenient to be staying at our friends home for the month because we can offer our guests their own room(and it’s more than our living room floor)! Though the weather has been windy, rainy and glum the last few days have been very good.

Last night I had dinner with a friend and we talked about how results and future events are in God’s hands. We both have a tendency to want to do things to somehow produce, what is in our minds, the right results. She encouraged me by saying that God knows every detail of the stories in my life and is working them out from beginning to end. I should work with Him by being faithful in obedience, thankful in prayer and content in His will. This morning I read a quote by William Penn that addressed well this issue of perspective, “Disappointments that come not by our own folly are the trials and corrections of heaven. It is our own fault if they do not prove to our advantage. To see the hand of God in them, with a humble submission to His will, is the way to turn our water into wine. If we look only to our losses, consider how little we deserve what is left. Our passion will cool, and our murmurs will turn into thankfulness. In Him, his humble, sincere disciples find more that all that they lose in the world. All we have is the Almighty’s; and shall not God have His own when He calls for it?”

Bobby and I have had many conversations recently where I need this perspective. May it be about troubled students, family matters or our taxes…it doesn’t really matter if things are turning out how I had hoped or deemed right. What matters is what the Lord is working together and whether or not I am found faithful in believing Him.

“‘I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future‘.” Jeremiah 29:11

Yesterday we went to the San Mateo Reservoir for a mile walk on the trails. I took this picture because it looked so peaceful. The Godsong website will soon have a song available called “Perfect Peace.” One of the lines in it says, “You establish peace through the works You do, Jesus, Your love doesn’t cease.” I thought about how true those words are that God establishes peace through His works and in His time, not mine. God is so much bigger than my tiny mind can remember. I frequently become worried or discontent with the way life unfolds, but God has all of the moments today and tomorrow scheduled on His clock and anything that He has orchestrated to take place in that time will. What does not, I must be patient to wait on Him. He reigns above all of the rain, wind and waves…He can calm any storm inside you and me. I really like the last line of this song, it says, “Blessed is the man whose mind’s on You, You will keep him in perfect peace…”