April 26th, 2005
Last night Bobby was telling me a crazy story about my brother-in-law, Billy. Billy recently has been watching some actors and movie people filming sequences for a television show that some of us watch. They were working on some scenes outside some apartments by the college he attends. I told Bobby that I thought it is silly how people get so worked up about celebrities these days, but conceded that it was pretty cool experience to see real actors in action.
The other day I received an invitation to a huge family reunion for my father’s side of the family. It urged us to attend saying that everyone would “really want to see us”. I started thinking about how interesting it is to see people. When we see a celebrity we are in awe, we get excited and ask for an autograph or picture and stare and gawk. When we haven’t seen someone for a long time under good circumstances we are happy to see them, catch up and notice good things about how they’ve grown or changed. When we haven’t seen someone for a long time under bad circumstances we feel nervous, anxious and hesitant. When we see someone that we don’t really like we might avoid talking to them or pass judgments on them.
This is all intriguing to me because I have people in my life who fall into each category, well…other than the celebrity one. I love to see my husband. I see him every day. I can’t wait to come home from work and be there together. I love just looking at him, listening to him talk, making him laugh, watching him read, just being with him. It is all so enjoyable and he is so encouraging to me. Seeing him is a highlight most every day.
There is another person I have to see regularly that I do not look forward to seeing, and sometimes even dread seeing. It has become an agony for me because it isn’t just seeing this person that is bad, it’s not like they are painful to look at. It is how they are that I dread. I know that they talk very loudly, walk loud, slam doors, and almost every conversation I have with this person is one sided because they talk constantly about themselves, their possessions, and their achievements. It is very discouraging.
I have long been in awe over the relationships that God had with some of the people in the Old Testament. How he walked in the garden with Adam, counted Abraham as His friend, the depths to which David knew Him, as a “man after God’s own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14). The story that really blows me away and gives me chills to read is in Exodus 33, when Moses meets with the Lord. It is an amazing passage of Moses waiting in a tabernacle for the Lord. And God, in the pillar of cloud descends into the tabernacle to talk with him. Verse 11 says,
“So the Lord spoke to Moses face to face,
as a man speaks to his friend.”
It is so hard for my mind to grasp that God, the Creator of the heavens and the earth and all things that exist, spoke to a man so intimately. What is even more mind blowing is that He is the same God today that He was then. And we do not have to go into a tabernacle to talk to Him. We have clear passage from our heart straight to His throne room in prayer. And yet how seriously do we take this. Usually I find myself just taking this for granted.
This conversation between God and man continues as Moses recounts that he has obeyed what the Lord has commanded of him, to bring the Israelites to that place and he asks God to show him the way he must go. And God responds in verse 14,
“My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
To this Moses wonders how he and the people will be assured of God’s presence. The rest of this conversation is astounding as the Lord responds in verse 17,
“‘I will also do this thing that you have spoken;
for you have found grace in My sight, and I know you by name.’”
And he said, “Please, show me Your glory.”
Then He said, ‘I will make all My goodness pass before you,
and I will proclaim the name of the Lord before you.
I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion.”
But He said, ‘You cannot see Me, and live.’
And the Lord said, ‘Here is a place by Me, and you shall stand on the rock. So it shall be, while My glory passes by, that I will put you in the cleft of the rock, and will cover you with My hand while I pass by. Then I will take away My hand,
and you shall see My back; but My face shall not be seen.’”
Later it is recorded that when Moses came down from the mountain that the skin of his face shone. What an indescribable experience! Sometimes I think that the people in the Old Testament where so fortunate to see and know God in these amazing ways. But I know from the Word that God is the same today as He was then and I can talk to Him. I don’t have to go into a tabernacle and hope that God will meet me there. In Christ I have been given an open passage into the throne room of grace through prayer. This story of Moses invigorates me to evaluate my heart and find if there is any wicked way cluttering that passage of my heart to speak to the Lord. When God looks at my heart could He say, “you have found grace in My sight”?
We sing all these praise songs about God’s glory and wanting to see Him. I wonder if we are singing those songs with genuineness in our hearts before the Lord because I think it is both a scary and beautiful thought, to see Him in His glory. I consider it with fear when I read Revelation 1:13-18 describing Jesus in glory and also chapter 4 giving a vivid description of the throne room of heaven. I think of it as beautiful because God promises those who are His rest, as in Matthew 11:28. I don’t know if I would even have the courage to pray, “Lord, show me your glory.” But the reality is that one day I will see His glory. 1 John 3:2 says,
“Beloved, now we are children of God;
and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be,
but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him,
for we shall see Him as He is.”
It makes sense to me then, that the next verse, 1 John 3 talks about how all who hope to see Him in His glory make it their number one goal to live life their way, getting all they can and doing whatever it takes to please themselves. NO! It says,
“And everyone who has this hope in Him
purifies himself, just as He is pure.”
This afternoon I was reading Psalm 63 and I couldn’t stop re-reading the first two verses. And as I come into that throne room of prayer I can see that He is so wondrous and then I am so convicted of my unholiness before Him that my heart cries the prayer of David’s in verses 1-2:
“O God, You are my God;
Early I will seek You;
My soul thirsts for You;
My flesh longs for You
In a dry and thirsty land
Where there is no water.
So I have looked for You in the sanctuary,
To see Your power and Your glory.”
Open the eyes of my heart Lord, I want to see You…
April 26th, 2005
Christa,
I love psalm 63 - it’s always been one of my favorites - to remind myself that my desire should be to see Him.
I couldn’t even imagine being Moses - and having the relationship that he did - so that God would allow him to see Him.
It kinda reminds me of some of those people, who seem standoffish - or who are difficult to love - it takes time to develop that type of relationship. To trust someone - to know they love you - God had no doubts about Moses, and as a result - God allowed Moses to see Him - Wow - what I wouldn’t give for the chance to have that relationship.
Thanks! You helped put things into perspective!
Jen