Since last Sunday Bobby and I have been enjoying some time off the schedules and on the road. We vacated our home for the week to drive down the coast–stopped to see my family on the Central Coast, spent a couple of days helping Bobby’s parents unpack and paint in their new home in Canyon Country, met up with Ty and spent a couple of days with his family in San Diego and even enjoyed an afternoon with my sister at Disneyland. All in all it’s been a relaxing time, but now refreshed we’re are excited to be heading home tomorrow as we get ready to go back to work and welcome in the Fall.

The Lord has been faithful to continue to give me opportunities to grow and change this week. He does not seem to differentiate between vacation days and normal days. When we pray for change and we seek to find Him, He takes us up on it each step of the way. I’ve been learning alot about my own pride and selfishness lately but I am immensely blessed by the fact that God has not left me here. He has also shown me some valuable things about humility. I am finding that where the Spirit convicts, there He provides ample opportunities for me to grow in righteousness. I can’t just say, “Please change me, God!” But rather spiritual life is the process of putting off my natural sinful ways and putting on the character of Christ. The Lord does not convict us and then leave us to find our own way to righteousness, but is the instigator and sustainer of this entire process of faith as we follow and surrender to Him.

Today I was reading 2 Corinthians 12 where Paul talks about struggling with a “thorn in the flesh.” He even writes in verse 8 that he prayed to God and asked Him to remove the trial or hindrance that pained him. But verse 9 transitioned my focus from a human and worldly perspective, sympathizing for Paul; to God’s thoughts on the thorn as He answered Paul’s prayer, “And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’” God would not remove the trial Paul was suffering but promised to continually give him the grace to endure it. God offers the same grace to us each day. It is alot more difficult to see that I need grace when I’m so focused on my own strength and doing things on my own. When I am empty, and low His grace lifts me up and allows me to conquer the pains of life in the victory of His power. I love how He says His grace is sufficient. His grace is more than enough. It wasn’t just enough grace to save but then I’m on my own for the rest of my days. His grace doesn’t just cut it for the morning or times of trials. It is sufficient. This means that it is perfect, whole, there is nothing lacking from it.

Sometimes I try to do things on my own. It is difficult to admit when I am wrong or when I need help. It is painful to confess my sin to someone. All of these things reflect pride. I wonder if anyone else has ever tried to better themselves in their own strength like I have. I want to discipline myself and grow in godly character and somehow show myself to God and seem deserving of His grace. But this is opposite of the whole meaning of His grace. I can’t ever deserve it! God’s grace is the very thing that has plucked me from being lost in sin and created me anew in Christ. I never could have done that on my own and yet I always am trying to live this life alone. If we could get over our pride and come weak and empty before the Lord we would find more grace than we could imagine–not only grace to be saved, but also to turn from sin, to run after righteousness, and endure trials. His grace is so much more than enough!

Your grace has found me just as I am.
Empty handed but alive in Your hand.