Last week was my last week at work. For the first time in awhile I do not have school or a job. Bobby and I have been calling it my early “retirement”. Even though I don’t have a job in the post-modern sense I will certainly be working. I have been a wife and cared for our home full time before this week, but now I am at liberty to do so without also working another job.

Many people today look down on a woman who does not spend part or all of her time working outside of the home. People often act as though it is much more commendable to climb the ladders of success in the workforce all the while paying for quality child and home care to free them up. I’ll admit that some people do not portray well the idea of working inside the home. Some women seem frazzled and overwhelmed and not much seems to get done around the home, in the kitchen or with the children. I have witnessed several women who work for the family and home as a lifestyle and do so beautifully. My mother is a loving wife who raised six children, cared for her home, fed us all and still had time for interests of her own. I know that some women think I’m just naive, and though I haven’t experienced all there is in the realm of wife and mother, I am learning to rely not on self but in the Lord.

I know that our lives will change a lot with me not working and when the baby comes. Things won’t be as cut and dry. I am excited about having time to devote to this role of helpmate. I cannot be Superwoman, but I would much rather be a woman who pleases God. Only with His grace, can I be the wife and mother that He wants me to be.

Rather than comparing my new position to what others think or what is projected in our culture, I am eager to have the Lord fashion my role closer to what He sees as important. In Genesis 2:18, God said that Adam was not good by himself because he needed a “helper.” So God made Eve to be his wife, a companion that would perfectly complete him. Proverbs 31:10-31 says that an excellent wife is very valuable and hard to find. Her energy is toward her husband and her household. She is trustworthy and diligent as she watches over and cares for her home. She is resourceful, hardworking and even has time to reach out to those in need. She smiles at the future because she is well prepared and fears the Lord. Her husband and children call her blessed. This is what God values in a wife and mother. I don’t know what Oprah, Martha Stewart, the latest Glamour or Self magazines are saying. I notice from being in line at the grocery store enough that they offer tips on how to throw great parties, get your body in shape, have a better love life and boost your career in just seven easy steps! All the while a picture on the same magazine displays the latest troubled Hollywood couple. Obviously all those steps didn’t work out for them. I’m pretty confident that life will be best if I go with what God values rather than these.

My marriage and home are not perfect and never will be. But God is not the author of confusion (1 Corinthians 14:33) and does not leave us to figure out our roles on our own. His yoke is easy and His burden is light. (Matthew 11:30) Bobby and I can focus on seeking Him and trusting His Word. For it is not by our own strength or pride that we can accomplish God’s will, but only by His grace and provision can we attempt to live in a way that would bring glory to Him. I pray that as we step out on this new season of life that the Lord will help us to “walk by faith, not by sight.” (2 Corinthians 5:7)