Sin permeates every aspect of man’s behavior including marriage. God provides forgiveness of sin through the Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, man can be forgiven by God and can live in harmony with other men. (This includes husbands and wives!) Christians should graciously accept the forgiveness that they have in Christ and graciously bestow forgiveness upon their spouses “…forgiving each other, just as God in Christ has forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

(The Excellent Wife, p.23)

Uh-oh, a blog about sin…if you are thinking of skipping this post, I understand why, but I hope you’ll stick it out anyway! When I came to chapter three of Martha Peace’s The Excellent Wife I saw the title and groaned–”A Wife’s Understanding of Sin.” I knew it was going to be convicting but I also knew that I needed to hear it so I kept reading. And as she has so far this book, she nailed me yet again on a weakness of mine…forgiving others sins. The good thing about Peace is that she doesn’t just bulldoze you and leave you lying there, she also gives practical helps to take the steps of obedience that God has prepared for us to do.

I really appreciate how candid Peace writes…sin is a reality, a fact. It is present every day and we can see it in our attitudes, thoughts, words and if we’re willing to see the truth, in our marriages. We cannot ignore it. Romans spells it out for us in chapter 3 verse 23

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”

None of us are exceptions to this problem of sin. But in His mercy God saw fit to provide a solution to this worldwide, history long epidemic of sin…He gave us Jesus Christ! Easter is coming up and maybe like me you are taking some time to reflect over the weighty reality of what Christ had to endure to take your and my place before God. We deserved death for being sinners, but He died for us so we could be forgiven. That is amazing!

As Christians, we are now forgiven by God because of our faith in Christ. We accept that forgiveness from Him a little flippantly sometimes. We can become casual about our sin not remembering the weight of what happened to forgive us from it. In my own life it is all too easy to justify wrong attitudes by blaming them on being tired or because I’m having a bad day. If I considered the magnitude of what took place so I could be forgiven I don’t think I’d be so hasty to defend myself and my sin.

I love how Peace makes us think through the cycle of forgiveness by taking us to Ephesians 4:32. God has forgiven us, in turn we must forgive others. I sure don’t want to act like the servant in Matthew 18:21-35. Remember the parable of the merciful master and the unmerciful servant? It’s worth a refresher…

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

”Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

“The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.

“His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’

“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.

“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Jesus takes forgiveness very seriously. His death made our forgiveness possible and He requires that we do the same to everyone and anyone who wrongs us. How sad that in this story we are the servant who was forgiven a huge amount (all our sin was forgiven by God) and yet we go around choking our husbands over pennies (by comparison). We wives need to humble ourselves, consider the forgiveness we have received and from the heart, with patience, forgive our husbands any and every offense. We know that every day we still sin and yet God is graciously bestowing mercy and forgiveness on us. Who are we to not graciously bestow forgiveness on our husbands?