While it was still dark this morning, my husband, Bobby headed out with a group of fellow CBC-ers for a ten-day trip to the Holy Land. So now it’s just me and the little dude, holding down the fort!

Whenever we are apart I am reminded how I need to always entrust my husband (and anyone) to the Lord. I wish I would remember to have this attitude on a daily basis. I guess when he is gone it seems easier to worry about circumstances yet to unfold or be anxious that I cannot determine the details or be scared about all of the “what-ifs”. But it is so foolish to act this way if he is home or away when I know that I can entrust him to the Lord, because He has planned every detail and will bring it to pass for His glory.

This morning a friend sent me Psalm 91:1-2

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

I love this picture of the intimate protection we have when we trust God–dwelling in His shelter and resting in His shadow. That’s where I want to be!

If you would like to follow the Compass Israel trip with me, Bobby will be posting blogs, pictures and videos daily at the Compass Bible Church website. I would also appreciate your partnership in prayer for the group, that it would be an enriching time for them all to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

I had the opportunity to attended a Biblical Counseling seminar in San Diego on Saturday. Not only was it a beautiful drive down the coast in sunny 90 degree weather, but then I was deposited with 5 hours of intense Biblical teaching on the topics of Forgiveness and Counseling Blended Families.

Dr. Street was so helpful in explaining why saying “I apologize” or “I’m sorry” are not Biblical forgiveness.

• Apologize comes from the word “apologia” which means “to throw up a defense”. Really apologizing is a form of personal defense, passing the blame to something outside of self.

• Saying “I’m sorry” shows sorrow but really just says “I feel bad about this.” Stopping here will not accomplish forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not the end goal, but is “one small slice of the pie of reconciliation.” Biblical forgiveness occurs when a Christian owns responsibility for a sin committed toward another Christian, acknowledges it as sin against God and the person, seeks that person’s forgiveness, and when it is granted they make restitution where needed and seek to rebuild the relationship to be honoring to the Lord. Then he explained that Biblical forgiveness makes a three fold promise–

1. I won’t bring this up to you. I will not hold this against you.
2. I won’t bring this up to anyone. It is a dead issue.
3. I won’t bring this up to myself. I will not dwell on it in my heart.

We do not forgive and forget, but we can forgive to forget. Because if we were enacting these three things toward the one asking for forgiveness eventually we will forget about it because we will not be rehearsing the sin in our hearts or talking about it with them or others.

As Christians we must always be ready to forgive others because we are right in our hearts before God. If you are sinned against you must settle the issue in your heart before God, and that makes you ready to grant automatic forgiveness right when the offender seeks it.

When we encounter someone who refuses to forgive someone there is a question mark about their faith because Christians are forgiven people in Christ, therefore we forgive others. Dr. Street spent a good amount of time expounding on this from Ephesians 4:32.

Be kind and compassionate to one another,
forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

If we have truly been forgiven by God, we will be forgiving people. I thought a lot about how putting Biblical forgiveness into action would radically change the life of the church. People wouldn’t be nursing bitterness in their hearts, talking to others about the wrongs done to them or continually reminding each other of past sin. Instead forgiveness, reconciliation and the rebuilding of relationships would be on ongoing process building each other up and building unity together in relationships that are a model of the gospel.

That sums up just about one hour of the seminar, which was pretty eye opening for me and will definitely affect how I seek and grant forgiveness from now on. It is critical that we understand and put into action Biblical forgiveness. I hope this brief recap has been helpful!

My heavenly Father does not offer a “cafeteria plan” for obedience. I needed to respond to all of His instructions with an obedient spirit. I am not to merely pick and choose those that appeal to me.

Pat Ennis in Designing a Lifestyle that Pleases God, p.45

In keeping with my Spring Reading goals I’ve picked up Designing a Lifestyle that Pleases God, and when I read the above quote it stung because I know that I am tempted to do this. To heartily go after obedience in these areas and then when it comes to some I kind of just struggle and make excuses and tell people, “I’m working on it.” I was convicted. The book of James nails us on this many times, especially in chapter 2:8-11 where it says that there is no such thing as a “cafeteria plan” for God’s commands and then in chapter 4 we see so clearly that this wrong thinking about obedience cannot coexist with the truth of James 4:17!

Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.

I’m starting to hear people say that if someone challenges them to obey all of God’s Word that is legalism. They think that they can be a Christian and somehow be allowed to remain unchanged in the areas they choose and obey only the commands that are convenient for them. Then, if anyone says that I should be seeking to be fully obedient to God’s commands, that person is legalistic.

Last weekend, Pastor Mike was extremely helpful on this when he said “If you’re into keeping God’s commandments and telling other to do the same you will be called a legalist. That is not legalism. That is called, according to John 14:15 and 1 John 2, love! If you love God you will keep His commandments, what you are accusing me of is asking you to love God!”

When we talk about obeying all of God’s commands we don’t mean to earn salvation, we mean because of our salvation. Obedience is a response to salvation not a means to salvation.

How can I obey God in loving others but not being willing to forgive a wrong done against me. How can I obey God in His command for me to be faithful to my husband but then say I’m not willing to submit to my husband? This doesn’t even make sense. If we are going to obey God, we must obey all that He says. We can’t pick and choose. This is not up for a debate.

“If you love me, you will obey what I command.”

John 14:15

After thinking through that quote from my book I re-listened to Pastor Mike’s sermon (which you can listen to by clicking here) and it was really helpful as I tried to list out commands I try to exempt myself from. I pulled our my notebook and wrote down commands that came to mind that I tend to cringe at. I also write down any ways I know that I try to bend the rules. For example, acting like gossiping about a certain person is valid at this time with this situation, right? Wrong! Just seeing that written down was a good exercise because it helped me brainstorm ways I need to go out and obey those commands today.

We need to have a joyful and eager attitude about obedience. I love it when I ask Tyler to do something and he responds with his little sing-song-voice, “Okay, Mommy.” We need to put the cafeteria trays away and just say “Okay, God!”

“How healthy are you spiritually?”

That was the question in Bobby’s sermon from Titus 2 yesterday. People can put a great deal of thought and energy into physical health–dieting and exercise. You might not think that high school students are into health, but I’ve met many girls for meals and they order their cheeseburger “protein style”, so they can skip the carbs. One girl always gets salads but only with the dressing on the side. Another always chooses the 90 calorie “skinny lattes” when we meet at Starbucks. I’m amazed at the dedication some people have to going to the gym–they get up before dark, or won’t end their day till they’ve put in their minimum 30 minutes of sweat and agony. It is sad how we can be so careful to do what it takes to physically train our bodies and then treat our spiritual growth like an afterthought. Paul tells us in 1 Timothy 4:7-8 that

“…Train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.“

There is no debate, godliness is of much greater and lasting value that physical health. But most Christians don’t have a plan for their spiritual health– no spiritual diet, no spiritual workout regimen, no concern for their spiritual calorie intake. They just react to life as it happens and try to do their best to remember to live out the sermons Sunday to Sunday.

Bobby and I use a tool in our ministry called The Spiritual Growth Chart. It has five categories–Bible Reading, Prayer, Meditation, Church Service, Witness. Starting out with where you were last week, you then write out a goal for each category. The chart has four weeks in between to help you pace yourself to be disciplined in those areas. It is meant to be used with your “personal trainer” or “nutritionist”–basically a mentor, someone farther along than you in the faith who will keep you accountable.

I hope you will even consider using The Spiritual Growth Chart for just the next four weeks. Just writing out how you are doing at training yourself to be godly and goals you should be working toward can be clarifying and motivating. Click here to download a PDF you can print to get started! Feel free to personalize it to make it your own. On my chart I’ve added “Bible Study” and “Memorization”–you can customize yours for areas you need to work on.

Carolyn Mahaney is one of my favorite authors. What I enjoy so much about her books is how consistently loyal she is to the Biblical text and how personal and practical she responds to those passages in her writing. Her two other books–Feminine Appeal, a book about Titus 2 and Girl Talk, a book for moms and daughters about Biblical womanhood–have been instrumental in my personal growth and ministry.

So, when I saw this book pop up on my Amazon suggested products page I was excited, especially because Caroyln wrote it with her three grown daughters who all contribute to the GirlTalk blog. That same week I visited the local Christian bookstore and bought it and after reading this review, I hope that is what you will do too!

Shopping for Time helped me think through my days and how I spend my time and I easily saw how I need to readjust a few priorities, step-it-up in some areas and completely overhaul others. I know that I don’t always manage the time God has given me with the intensity and purpose that I ought to, so as I read this book I began to see that even though I thought, “I’m doing my best” managing my time, I really wasn’t.

What I enjoyed most about this book were the five practical tips to help me evaluate and accomplish the things that God has called me to do as a Christian woman. Too often we are harried, frazzled and overwhelmed as we run around trying to get done all that we think we need to do each day. This book is not a “system” or 5-step plan to life success. It is simply the disciplines the Mahaney women have exercised over the years that have greatly maximized their usefulness for the Lord. Here is a glimpse at the 5 Time-Saving-Tips:

Tip #1–Rise early, they propose that you join the “5 AM Club” to reap benefits both for your spiritual life and the good of your family.

Tip #2–Sitting at Jesus’ Feet, making reading and studying God’s Word, prayer and meditation top priority.

Tip #3–Taking a Personal Retreat, a time to study God’s Word, read pertinent books to where you are in life, devise solutions to some of our problem areas and make goals and plans that are thought out and Biblical for the upcoming months.

Tip #4–Consider People by evaluating relationships carefully. Do your friends sharpen you? Do you have a mentor and are you a mentor to someone? Are you reaching out to others by being a friend? Are you evangelizing those who need salvation?

Tip #5–Plan to Depend: being productive in daily life. One thing in this chapter that has really helped me is what they call the “15:4 rule.” Fifteen minutes of planning in the morning, saves four hours of your day. When I read this chapter I started doing this the next morning and have found each day to be so productive because I wasn’t wasting time trying to nail down what I needed to do next.

I hope reading these five ideas that you have some ideas about how you may need to change your schedule tomorrow! This book is simple, easy-to read and short, only 94 pages! What made this book so helpful is that it’s not about teaching us how to perfectly execute our daily plans, but to make sure our heart is wholly God’s, focused on Him and His priorities, relying on Him to accomplish each task and being intentional about living every day for His glory!